Trouble Thinking

October 14, 2010

MMORPG Anonymous

Filed under: Video Games — Mrs. Orange @ 2:34 am

Hi, my name is Lisa and I am addicted to the World of Warcraft. It’s been one year and two months since I last logged in.

I deleted the game off of my computer and cancelled my account. I have placed my trust in a higher power. I have apologized to the people whom I have wronged.

But I’m talking to you today because Cataclysm is coming out in a couple months, and sometimes, during the long and lonely nights, I’m afraid I lack the strength to resist its pull.  It’s during these weaker moments that I remember the good times spent /laughing with friends and running dungeons with Aldonza, my DPS machine. But, even then, I can’t forget the fact that three years with that game has left a mark on my psyche that I feel even after a year of sobriety.

Aside from the little things, like salivating when I hear the word “epic” and getting inexplicably irritated when someone mentions Chuck Norris, the game warped my ego. I gained an inflated sense of importance that doesn’t seem to translate into real-world confidence and life skills.

I used to be a financial genius that could manipulate the Azerothian economy to suit my mount-related needs. Now, when I ask my mom if I should start saving for retirement, she laughs at me. I used to have valuable skills and sought-after talents that contributed to the well being of my guild. Now, I can make a sort-of-decent pie. I constantly lament the fact that you can’t level up basic world understanding in a point-based system and that my smaller achievements tend to go unacknowledged.

I am also left with a physical reminder of my former addiction. As I type this, I feel the phantom pain of one-too-many rogue-style backstabs radiating from my wrist. Too veiled? Yes, WoW gave me carpal tunnel. Similar to how a meth addict will have to deal with the unfortunate ramifications of “meth face” the rest of his or her life, I have to deal with a right wrist that lacks a full range of motion. But we all have our crosses to bear.

I think that it’s fair to say that I’ve never regretted quitting, but that doesn’t mean I don’t miss it. I just miss the state of arrested development that the game provided; Azeroth is so much easier to live in than Earth. Mistakes aren’t permanent and the character you invest so much time and money on ultimately isn’t a reflection of yourself, which makes it easy to abandon. But I’m in the real world now and, unfortunately, it’s just me. I want to become a fully functioning member of society, but I’m not sure I’m specced for that.


  1. Stop trying to distract us from your meth face. We’re still having that intervention.

    And I’m not sure what you mean when you say the skills don’t translate. I think your leveling up in pie-making is a direct result I’d that cookbook you found while fishing in the sewers under– wait a second…

    Comment by princesspierogi — October 14, 2010 @ 7:21 am

    • “Of,” not “I’d.” Autocorrect hurt me here.

      Comment by princesspierogi — October 14, 2010 @ 7:26 am

  2. I definitely remember about a year where you were conspicuously absent. At least alcoholism is a social disease!

    Comment by Durandal — October 14, 2010 @ 10:57 am

    • you’re a social disease

      Comment by SrMeowMeow — October 15, 2010 @ 6:03 pm

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