Trouble Thinking

June 25, 2010

“Tough Old Guy” Stories Are Awesome

Filed under: Movies — Tags: , , — Chris @ 11:12 pm

It’s been a pretty crappy summer movie season, but I think I’ve finally found a film I can look forward to. Granted, this one comes out in October, which is not considered summer by any definition I’m familiar with, but that’s a minor quibble.

One of my favorite plotlines is “grizzled bad ass comes out of retirement for one final job.” I think I just like the idea that, at the end of the day, even if you’re not as strong, fast, or whatever as you used to be, experience and practice will always win out at the end. It’s always exciting to watch a person who is supremely competent at something, especially a physical activity, get it done—particularly, as is often the case with these sorts of stories, when this competence is completely unexpected by the other characters. Furthermore, as movies tend to be about activities that are already exciting to watch in the first place (there are not many about a guy who is the best roofer, for example), the end result, can oftentimes be extra satisfying.

Red has this going on two levels. Not only is it about expert former CIA operatives, but it has an amazing cast of highly skilled actors. Bruce Willis, Morgan Freeman, John Malkovich, and Helen Mirren? The only thing better than a comedy starring talented comedians, is a comedy starring talented actors, and you can’t get much more talented than that lineup right there. Combined with the fact that in the trailer alone they just look to be having an absolute blast, promises that Red will be a film that will hit me on all the right levels.

May 17, 2010

Black Dynamite: Outta Sight You KNOW It’s Right!

Filed under: Movies — Tags: , , , — Durandal @ 12:09 pm

You’re sitting around wondering why you feel so low-down, aren’t you? Why the world seems to have lost all color slowly, and your favorite foods turn to ash in your mouth?

I have something that will fix that.

Do you wonder why you can barely do kung-fu and when you do hardly any suckers fly out a plate-glass window into the street?

They just sort of... thump. *Sigh*

I told you I can fix that.


Black Dynamite is a movie, it’s a movie you most likely did not see because it was too excellent for most theaters. Unfortunately, not seeing this piece of cinemaphonic excellence makes life into a cascade of colorless calamity. You owe it to yourself, your friends, your family, your sweet little puppy dog to go out and buy the living hell out of this film. It is equal parts comedy, action, and manual for a better life.

I give you my personal guarantee that by the end of this film, you will be an inch taller and your hair will be more full and silky. By the end of this film you will be able to run farther and jump higher. By the end of this film I guarantee you will be able to wear sunglasses inside and no one will question it because you will look too damn hip.

Black Dynamite will treat you right.

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